045: an episode
Thursday, 22 June 2017
My baby sister is going to her university soon and my Kakak Besar’s heart (read: me) is not prepared yet. She is not the last one, I still got my two others baby brothers which already taller than me that it always make me pissed-off. I am 169cm and used to be the tallest one among my siblings /pushing the reality asides now/ I remember how Hafiz and Amirul, both were so mad at me because I used to tease their physical shortness lol.
Taste the karma now Faten :’)
They occasionally put their hand on my head and pat it (like real hard I thought my head would become twisted) too! That is soooooooo disgracing on many levels!
I used to distance myself from my siblings. I do not talk that much and would usually do my homework on my study table inside my rooms only. I don’t share about who my secret crush(es) or even how tired am I at school with my siblings. I basically kept things to myself. If I talk to them, well, it would be in forms of:
1 – yelling(s)
2 – command(s)
3 – angry/fierce tones
Basically what almost every Kakak Besar do. Lol.
I always wonder what is it like to have older brother/sister but now that I think back – I rather not. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.
I noticed how things started to change after I ‘move’ to Selangor pursuing my tertiary education here, away from my family. It’s been three years, I guess? Almost. I guess being away from your closed one could make you realize how precious some relationships are.
I talk to my mom a lot, like a real a lot that I think my Mom even malas naklayan me already. I would send messages at Izzati once in a while, telling things – sometimes even the smallest thing ever exist that she will goes “Tu pun nakcakap. *insert-malas-nak-layan-emoticon*” and I would counter back “ah nanti kau rasa padan muka.” I sent WhatsApp to Hafiz once which makes me want no more sending him text. I messaged him “Hai pakwe.” in the morning which he later replied at night.
Or is it the tomorrow’s night?
How loving we are isn’t?
Whenever I’m back at homes, we would spend our time watching movies on my laptop. Every one would snuggle in their own blankets and pillows, packed on me and my sister well-made queen sized bed. Since we usually watch horror themed movies :’) The only genre that could cater everyones liking as sappy love movie is a no-no for my brothers (but they watched Hikayat Cinta Si Pematah Hati hmph) and action/fighting movies would bored me and my sisters.
Horror genre is the only one which we could comes to agreement. And animation, occasionally.
Being away really makes me realize how blessed we are to be around our loved-ones. No matter how annoying they are (like asking ‘kak mu ado gewe doh kei kat u?’ /translate: Sis, you already have boyfriend isn’t at the university?/ while plastering the i’m-ready-to-dig-and-pissed-you-off-eyebrows) Don’t you think so?
There are things I only realized after such a long time and this blessing is one of them. They are growing up, one by one and I’m not ready to face more surprise. I’m thinking how my mother would feels like, seeing one by one of her *ehem* beloved well behaved children are getting bigger. We have Izzati, the accountant (since she usually bank in the money for me lol), Hafiz the pengawas solat (he twist my knee once to wake me up for Subuh :’) It works nevertheless) and Amirul...
being the annoying spoiled youngest through and through.
We took siblings’ picture once with Amirul’s smartphone and when I asked for the picture through WhatsApp, he said he already delete the picture.
HOW COULD YOU?!
Eyqa Zq said...
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